Monday, June 30, 2008

Punch me, Amy Winehouse, punch ME!

I was going to write about the My Bloody Valentine show I went to on Saturday, but what is to say, it was extremely ferocious and that is that.

Instead I wish to discuss the more important issue of who is going to be the new Doctor Who! Well done the Big British Castle for keeping this under wraps, I was genuinely surprised when I watched Saturday's episode. Now, not being ten years old, I don't get the frisson of old watching this show, but once a series it still gets me a bit, and this week was like that! And last night I lay awake for far too long trying to work out who the new Doctor Who would be. It is a starmaking turn after all but you can't turn up and be rubbish. Now let me think let me think who was on my list...

1. Martin Freeman (from off of out of The Office)
I dreamt this one after I had gone to sleep so maybe it is more accurate.

2. Rory (son of Roy) Kinnear.
Rory is a good actor and the right age but maybe not heroic enough to make an action figure of

3. Andrew Lincoln (from off of out of Teachers)
I have a feeling his face is too square

4. Julian Barrett (from off of out of The Mighty Boosh)
Quite intense. Plays "exasperated" well. Can Doctor Who have a moustache though?

5. Someone really dull who has been on Spooks or Waking The Dead or Hustle
I have ruled all these people out on the basis that common sense will prevail

6. James Bolam
A stop gap is required, enter the former Likely Lad. Much too old for stunts, might need a truss

7. Alan Davies
Davies is a thesp but he bit a tramp's ear and that will not be forgotten by his paymasters at the BBC. A note: Stephen Fry sounds good but would be horrible

8. Richard E. Grant
It is ten years too late for this

9. Dave Gorman
From out of left-field selection, baffling all but the cognoscenti

10. Sophie Ellis-Bextor/ Carl Weathers / Tom "Lenk"
Peculiar stunt casting reflecting "the unique way the BBC is funded" is possible, but will not go down well

ADDENDUM: If it is James Nesbitt I am never watching ever, ever again. I am also very ambivalent about Robert Carlysle. If the selection must be regional, I demand Alex Kapranos from off of out of Franz Ferdinand, he can solve some problems in space I am certain.


Unknown said...

At New Doctor time I like to play a game I call "most inappropriate casting for Doctor Who". SO far I have:

Ross Kemp
Jeremy Clarkson
Tony Blair
Matt Lucas
Ricky Gervais

David Tennant will be a tough act to follow. I say get Johnny Depp.

Unknown said...

I am half expecting a "regenerated as myself" scenario, but the episode was extremely exciting and...dare I say...emotional? Good stuff.

John A said...

Matt: I think Alan Dale aka Jim Robinson from Neighbours would be an exceptionally poor choice.

Unknown said...

Especially since he's already been in Torchwood. I'd be like the episode of Cheers where the future Marty Crane appears as a commercial pianist.


(moment of sad realisation)


I need a life, don't I?

Geoff Holtby said...

Bah, you are a fool if you think they could keep Tennant leaving early under wraps when they couldn't even keep Davros or The Master secret. David Tennant will regenerate into David Tennant somehow. That's why the kept showing us shots of his hand in the jar, it will figure heavily in the technobabble, mark my words.

I would however give anything to see David Tennant regenerate into Brian Blessed.

D said...

The hand thing is probably right, but I would accept any alternative Doctor from The Curse of Fatal Death. Especially the Richard E Grant one.

alice said...

Dr Who, meh. What everyone really wants to know is how long you lasted before putting in earplugs.

Unknown said...


Bah, the Master and Davros were totally a given from the moment the series was resurrected. And as for the BBC managing to keep Tennant leaving early under wraps:

(Matt, STOP IT. NOW)

superOK said...

Whilst i'm not a big Dr Who fan, I reckon good choices would be Danny John Joules or the floppy haired guy out of The Green Wing.

Lorri said...

The rumors I've heard say he's going to regenerate into two Doctors and then one will go off with Rose.
I will admit to being a big stupid girl and will be upset to have no David Tennant if he has left left (and I've also heard he's already shot the Christmas episode so I don't know how that would work without him) and it will take roughly a year to get used to a new Doctor. I will possibly start liking the new Doctor just before he regenerates...

John A said...


I am a martyr to my eardrums these days and watch most (electric) gigs with earplugs. Anyone who left them out at the MBV show was potty. During the 25 minutes of feedback in You Made Me Realise, I had my hands clamped over my ears, over the earplugs, it was frightening!

Bugs and Fishes said...

Great list! Even the slightest possibility of a Spooks / Hustle type actor being involved makes me very unamused...

Mostly my poor small brain is exploding with confusion at DT regenerating yet still being in this year's Christmas episode. Unless they're going to have two Doctors at Christmas time & he's about to regenerate into David Morrissey? Argh.

MrKneebone said...

Dammit, and I'm a season behind you in Australia! (it's okay though, i'm not really perturbed)

I reckon Julian Barrett could definitely pull it off. Richard E Grant would be a great choice too.

My Nominations:
1) Simon Pegg - except that he's probably got better things to do.

2) David Duchovny - but he's decidedly not british enough.

3) Richard Ayoade - maybe too quirky. Might make a good villain though?

4) Jack Davenport - suave, but maybe too dull.

5) Richard Coyle - energetic and good comic timing.

6) Mr Depp - would be perfect, but shame there's no chance.

7) Dylan Moran - if he could pull off enough "serious".

8) Bill Bailiey - his heart would definitely be in it.

9) Matt Bellamy (my answer to John's suggestion of Alex Kapranos)

10) A nobody - my personal preference.

And bring back Sally Sparrow as a fellow traveller! (some parts of the "Blink" episode in season 3 reminded me of SGR)

Sir Primalform Magnifico said...

In reply to Geoff Holtby's comment, I'd like to see him regenerate into Brian Blessed too. Then approximately one minute and forty seconds later get murdered by the other people in the TARDIS so he can regenerate into someone else. Murdered for just being himself. The annoying git.

Manners said...

(Came here via Scary Go Round, which I just have to say I absolutely love. ^^)

As for New Doctor choosing, I think a brilliant (read: cracktastic) and entirely inappropriate choice would be:
- Samuel L. Jackson.

gordon said...

John, I will pay good money for a "Cover your ears, it's My Bloody Valentine!" t-shirt. I saw them last night and everything is still fuzzy.

No-one else thought last week's Doctor Who was just a big mess then?

Benson said...

This may sound weird John (Can I call you John? it seems natural and you don't seem like the meglomaniac type (I knows it when I sees it)) but are you a fan of Adam and Joe? Of "The Adam and Joe Show" fame?

If you arn't ignore me, if you are you can ignore me too I suppose, not much i can do about it.

'scept seethe with impotent rage of course.

Benson said...

A mere glace to the right shows you are and that I am an idiot, sorry.

0Khan said...

I love My Bloody Valentine so hard. Omg. You are so lucky to live in the UK.