Tuesday, May 01, 2007

That little chlorine bath (for feet)

I realised today that it is almost 12 years since I last went swimming. I only stopped going swimming because my friend Martin Owen borrowed my goggles and lost them in Sheffield University sports centre pool. I decided not to go swimming again until he bought me a new pair. That was 1995, and you could fill a municipal lido with the tears I've shed since.

Of course, this stopped being a point of principle in about 1998, and indeed my college-era beer-storage frontispiece probably had a lot more to do with my lack of enthusiasm for the aquatic way (though it may have aided buoyancy!) In fairness, Mr Owen has had little opportunity to make amends from his no-doubt highly-paid position in the chemical engineering game, as we have not spoken since 2000.

So perhaps I should break this hoodoo, this Indian sign, and go back into the water. I don't know what will happen. What are people wearing to the pool? Should I go for a full body wax then rock a Speedo? That sounds awful!

The one thing that comforts me is that should I ever collect on my goggle debt, ocular interest will probably entitle me to a snorkel, mask and rubber duck.

9 comments:

Toni said...

Swimming multiplies the chances of accidentally dying (drowned). be kind to this entire collective of webcomic fans that would be extremely scared at the mere vision of Mr. Allison wearing goggles and a pair of flippers.
Not everyone can boast of being a mer-man!

Victoria said...

All the cool kids these days shave their chest hair in geometric shapes. Get with it!

brian said...

This is the second time I have seen the Spiderland cover today.

Liam said...

I think the full body swimsuit is the only way to go, as modelled by such established swimmers as Mr Ian Thorpe.

Incidentally, I was rather disheartened to find that Bobbins appears to have disappeared. I was intending to use it for some valuable procrastinating. Ah well, such is the way of life.

John A said...

Someone unknown to me renewed Bobbins.org years ago when I let it lapse while on holiday and I can't log in to renew it. You used to be able to renew anonymously on networksolutions.com but now you can't. I will ask Keenspot to put it on a subdomain of Keenspot so it will be back up eventually.

Sparkles F said...

I believe you should be able to get away with wearing what the young generation is now calling "swim trunks". They are short pants made out of material that does not appear to get too water-logged.
And no matter what you may see at your local pool/swimming hole, cotton y-fronts does not equal a speedo. Before you ask, yes, I've seen it. And I believe the "gentleman" in question was from Italy, but I am not sure.

John A said...

I'll try these "swim trunks", but what sort of cut should I get? Is piping considered too fancy? Can they be trimmed with brocade?

Roman said...

Brocade is not very hydrodynamic.

Sparkles F said...

I believe flames or a hibiscus print is in order. Piping is allowed, but only if you include some sort of lacing at the closure where Velcro is also highly encouraged.