Fans of my ability to wreck my car may be interested to hear how much hitting a gatepost costs. The answer is £1500! My car smells of valeting "fluids", it's like an embalmed zombie car. Its character seems to have changed, it is angry and thirsty for revenge. Tomorrow I will take to the roads in a gate-smashing rampage, incapable of controlling my limbs, brain or (probably) bladder.